Any copywriting advice misapplied will make someone look stupid. But I don’t see anything in my post or the full article that could be considered “sloppy” writing, unless you apply strict, formal rules, which are inappropriate in most advertising. Could you give me an example?

You used an expression here we both adopted. That term is “salesman.”

In fact, for years I have told general agency leaders about the difference between general agency writers and direct response writers in this way: “A skilled direct marketing copywriter is a salesman in disguise.”

In truth, all commercial writers should sell. But general agency copywriters are not evaluated based on sales. Their reputations are built on something else entirely.

What you talk about here deals with the core of what a direct response writer is all about — generating sales.